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  • Writer's pictureCaroline Botting

Losing control to gain your life back

When was the last time you felt completely in control of your life?

First thought - control looks different for everyone. Everyone has their level of comfort when it comes to their lifestyle and how much control you can have on your day to day. What does control look like for you?

Years ago my idea of control was having my five year plan mapped out and back up plans for my back up plans in case things went a little off. It bugged my husband to no end since he’s very much a fly by the seat of his pants guy.

My first notion that my idea of control had to change was when I had my first kid. And then again with my second (who was nothing like my first so even less control there). The minute you become a mom, you have even less control over your life than you could ever think possible. This little human makes it very clear very fast that you are no longer head honcho of your life. If they need something, you get to drop everything and deal with it. Plans to meet with friends but your kid just puked everywhere…yup changes happening. Plans to get in that workout but the little one won’t nap...again, changes.

So it’s no wonder through all this that if we feel like we can have control over something, we dive head first into it. Ever wonder why “bounce back” propaganda has been such a hit? It preys on the idea of finally having control over an aspect of our life. We can control what we put in our bodies. We can control how much we move. We can control our bodies and how we look, right? But, as much as we think we’re in control, we’re still not. There’s hormones, stress, and exhaustion coming into the mix and as much as you feel like you’ve got control, you don't - at least not in the way and amount that you think.

My question to you today is this:

What would your life look like if you didn’t need to control every aspect of your life?

Imagine not counting calories, or ww points. Imagine letting that workout slide. Imagine not using that new weight loss diet. Imagine taking a breath and having some self-compassion.

Could you stop controlling and start living without self-judgement?

What would it be like to stop worrying about what your butt looks like in those pants and just wear them because they fit well and make you feel good? How about if you stopped worrying about how many minutes of working out you have to do in order to burn those calories you just ingested? Clean eating, size zero, bathing suits, fitbit tracking, pictures...what would happen if you stopped worrying about controlling everything and just started living life to the fullest?

Freedom from the fear of not having control allows you the ability to gain your life back.

Read that again and let it sink in.

Letting go of control can afford you happiness, sanity, and self-love.

In the end - wouldn’t you love to be able to just be you and have that be enough?

I’m here to tell you that you are enough, no matter what and to shout it from the rooftops.

Leave that control behind and live your life.

If you don’t know how to begin and need a sounding board, or a cheerleader, or a person around who doesn’t have all the answers but is willing to figure them out with you, I’m here.

You deserve to be happy. You deserve to feel like you’re enough. You deserve more than you’re willing to give yourself.

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